My product free hair.....

My hair has grown, I mean alot. I had my last perm 1/2/2008. My stylist moved some 200+ miles away and I was more or less stuck. I always had a problem with stylist not really listening to my requests or goals for my hair. My hair grows, but I assumed it was from the trims and care of the stylist, not true. I was kinda giving myself good cae in between visits. I never used heat (I always had a wrap), would slather my head with coconut oil (I loved the smell, my hair happens to thrive in it) and my styilst used quality perms and took her time nevr overlapped. Funny how I thought it was her, "great care" when all along it was me LOL. The above picture is my hair washed and air dried without product. My camera is in my friends car, so I can't upload the image aI want to add right now. I have learned through trial and error over the last year how to make my curls pop. IC fantasia gel, cocoa butter and a little glycerin. I'm still working on the exact mixture. I LOVE Kenra shampoo and conditioners, I wish Kenra had a leave in. What I have been doing is saturating my hair with water, then putting a little of the Kenra back in and kinda rubbing that in, then applying the gel mixture section by section "raking" it through only with my finger, pulling the curls downward. At first the look like the waves in the picture, but as my hair dries it curls up perfectly. The process takes me less than 15 minutes, but it's cute. My 15 year old son said it looked like "a babys curly hair". My fiyah man at first stared at my hair, then said " you do have curly hair". He and I had a conversation about my hair a week or so ago. Another thing I've noticed with the whole hair thing, Hair types become the focus as your hair grows out. I really dont understand it so much, it can become vague and is the source of angry disagreements on the hairboards that I frequent. From what I understand: Type 1 straight Type 2 wavey Type 3 spirals Type 4 curls Each of the catogories is further broken in to sub catagoreis, but this is where it gets stickey. Type 3 curlies follow a size of curl width, however in the type 4 catagories, only the A and B have true curls. Yet 4C and to many 4B have no curl pattern.......like I said, confusing. All this being said, I forgot to mention you must have all natural hair and you must wait at least to have a couple inches of growth to really be able to assess. When I cut my permed hair off, I thought I would know right then. Wrong, wrong , wrong. My hair seemed to have no curl, no clumping together pattern at first, but as it grew a bit I noticed a defined curl pattern all over. My hair grows out, then curls on the end. I grew my hair out in braids and such so I never really saw it unless I was in between a take down. Looking at my hair now. I am constantly playing in the little curls and waves. I cut a tester piece below the curl to see what would happen, the cut peice just curled the same. This goes back to my saying you must grow some out first then assess your possible hair type. Back to my hair up top in the photo, it looks big, whispy like, but everything on the end curls. For more pics, check my Fotki and add me as a friend....I'm MSAJ.

Winter Blahs

Where the heck have I been???? Funny, I have not really been away, I actually look at this blog daily and start to write/type then start something else. I think it's winter, anyone else feel the blahs? This daily grey, cold,wet weather is a drag. I've read about this syndrome of seasonal depression. I know from my medical backround that it mostly has to do with the fact that I am not getting the amount of sun (vitamin D) that I normally get it the summer. I've heard and read of some folks going so far as to buy specific lights to sit in daily. I forget where, but I believe just 10 minutes or say per day is supposedly enough. Enough of the blah thoughts, it only reminds me even more of how blah it really is.

Merry Christmas

Inner me

Ok, again I have gotten very lazy in my inner self. I feel a bit heavy, but somewhat appropriate for my body. I want to lose weight, but dont want to be a skinny flat bump on earth. Right now I am very curvy. I could tolerate everything else, but my belly. I am seriously thinking about a tummy tuck,

Dinner party

Sunday past my fiyah man had a dinner party for his family and invited me. I went and felt good about it. Actually I felt kinda special. He was so attentive to everyone and me. I told him I was a little bit afraid. I felt like I had some inner "stage fright". Family is very important to him as it is to me as well. My family is just farther away, like 5 states, we live in his home.
He is an awesome cook, this I already knew, but a gracious host.
On that front all is progressing well.

My Hair

Somehow I am having problems finding and loading my hair pictures into this spot. I have a ton of pics and need to get it together. Another thing I realized when going back into this spot, I had gotten away from taking care of and endulging my hair. With that said, let me tell you how in love with my curls I am. I have not permed since January and I am not in the least bit wanting to perm it, nope not even thinking about it. I seriously play in the curlies all day long. Right now I am wearing a semi puff remake. I will upload a picture I promise.
One thing I have noticed, I don't take my vitamins daily as I used to, but I still reap the great benefits. About a month or so ago I stopped everything completly. My nails started peeling and my face really started to look sallow. I only wanted to test to make sure it was my intake that was causing all the changes. It speaks volumes about our intake as an undustrialized nation, or at least mine. I try to eat a good intake and exercise. I keep my weight at a decent level, (that's a forever work in progress) but really I shouldn't be this shocked but I am. I intend to do another test of the products I am using as in quality of name brand vs store brand. Stay tuned.

He loves me

What more to say.

Lust or Love

What exactly is LUST??

I used to believe it was similar to love. Lust as I have come to figure it, is the momentary desire to want something whether you should or shouldn't have it....You have got to have it. However once you have had it, the feeling quickly subsides. I have for the last few years felt this way or that and thought for a fleeting moment that maybe the feeling was something more. I think back now and see very clearly it was just plain ole lust. What I now wonder is why? Why do people, namely me think love first then moments later regret the thought and realize its not? The only conclusion I so far can see is that we lust for some one or thing and think love because that is what we are trained. I was trained to believe everything is love and I must love. I didn't learn the difference until much later in life.

I now believe I was only lusting for my ex-husband. I believe I was so headstrong and immature I didn't want to be the only girl that was single. I was too caught up in having a boyfriend and then being married. Everyone attempted to tell me in their own ways, but it only seemed to make me isolate them from me and made me try even harder to keep the pisspoor excuse of a relationship together. I think I honestly suffocated not only him, but my own self in my own dream like fantasy world. We never had anything in common, and never really wanted the same things in life. Everything was an argument and a true fight always ensued. As I really did deeper, I would venture to say it comes from leaving home so early.

Fade to 1977, my mother met and fell in love with a man I never liked. I had a great childhood prior to this. In March of 1978 they married. The marriage was different as I recall them never really sleeping in the same rooms. They always seemed to argue. He was a mean hateful man and still is to this day. In all these years I mostly remember him for constantly ruining something I enjoyed. I think he just plain got a kick out of it. As an adult now, I can see that pattern he had. I feel guilty if ruining plans my kids have.If my child is doing as they should and I have promised something, yet I decide not to follow through....I think it's wrong. As a parent I not only lead by my example, I verbally teach also.

I think this is where my first lessons were misconstrued. They couldn't teach me love, I have learned through unfortunate trial and error. I know lust.

Lust is what I have lived for the last 20 years. I had my first one and only true love 20 years ago. My daughters father. We had everything in common and got along very well. I was never jealous, nor did I think for a minute that he would lie or cheat on me. He had his friends, I had mine. We enjoyed each others company and that was how it was. Unbeknown to me, he lead a dangerous double life. I don't really remember how I found out, I just know it hurt like hell. I didn't find anything or see anything. He actually just came out and told me, I remember being on the phone with him and asking where he had been lately and why he hadn't called. He had gotten into trouble and now was in the process of clearing his life to make things right."I don't want to be with you anymore" simply put after 1 year. I felt like I couldn't breathe. when people say they feel like they got kicked and the wind knocked out of them.....I understand. I had panic attack like feelings when I was alone. I was on the bus one day and had to get off because I felt like I was about to burst into tears from nothing. Turns out not only was I hurting and depressed, I was pregnant. I was alone, emotional and young.

Fast forward to today. I am faced again with juggling my feelings and deciding what is real. I have so much in common with my fiyah man, I love his company and presence in my life. I am excited when I see him, even if its for a minute at work. The sound of his keys when he enters a room give me butterflies in my stomach. Laying next to him at night is the most at peace I have ever been. I sleep through the entire night. I have not been able to do that since having my children. I have built up walls around myself with excuses for why I am still single, he has surpassed each barrier. With all this why am I still afraid?

My body

I have dropped off, and gained some 10 pounds. I am a little upset with myself, but aware enough to know that I can defeat it now. Only thing I wonder and I know I do it to myself; I constantly tell myself to start on Sunday and when Sunday arrives I begin and the second I slipped up....I gave up. It may be on something as silly as eating a bite of some small something and I think "Oh well, I'm not that fat". However, I come from a family of fatties and must remain on top of it. And thus I begin again.

Him in my life

My fiyah man, what can I say and where to start or end. He is quite simply put, perfection. To try and put my thoughts and feelings into words is quite difficult. I can talk to him about everything. I even spoke and went quickly through this spot here. No one really knows about this blog, I like the anonymity of it. He is handsome, strong, intelligent and gentle all at the same time.

Time for me

Something I have been doing lately, taking time for just me. I quelled almost all of my overtime hours on the weekends. I have started to take my weekends off. Makes fr a happier me. I must have been burned out and didn't really notice it. I worked a zillion hours and still wasn't any further than I am right now. Funny how the more you make the more you spend. I can remember back in 1989 thinking 585. a month was a lot of money, rent was 380. and utilities were minuscule to say the least. Oops of subject again. Um, extra hours. Well, I figure the most I will do for now is 12 maybe 16 over. Its enough to be extra and enough to play with.

My fiyah man

He is wonderful, its so strange to meet someone that thinks like you do and can articulate your thoughts. I will tell you I am the first to say it, I can be overly critical and brash at times. Tonight, we talked a long time about everything. I am a bit apprehensive that I have such feelings about him, I am concerned that it's lust.

Dinner date

I went to the cheesecake factory, I had the best time. This man is really something different which is so comforting to me. I think I could almost erase all the numbers in my cell.

Swept off my feet

Last night I met someone that I really like and have a connection like I have not ever really known. I talked to him for hours, I really felt like I was talking to an old friend. I wasn't really concerned with money and what he could or couldn't do for me, I just enjoyed his company.

Men that can't handle their funds-I think I am a snob.

I was wondering why a particular dude had not called, his phone is off. This is not the first time. I'm talking in the last 2 months his cell phone has been cut off at least what twice? Somehow I have a real problem with that. He should really be much more cognizant or responsible. In addition to the near eviction. My sympathetic side wanted to help, my realistic side wanted to curse him out for even getting that far gone. I have had my share of problems in the last few months, but somehow I don't think mine are as bad. Something to ponder...why do I feel better than someone else when they are having the same problems? Am I a snob?
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Hook up by a friend and the happy hour party....

Well, the latest. He is a hook up from a friend. Yesterday was the first time we, or should I say<>

Speed ahead back to where I am now. The man I am seeing was introduced to me through my coworker. Nice guy, but not neccessarily "type". But I am wondering what exactally is my type? I like his presence and being around him while we are at home, but we are not the same as far as when we go out. I love to be out and party and have a good time with friends. He is more reserved and quiet. Yesterday was a happy hour party with co-workers, I had invited him to come along, but he was ready to go, almost as soon as we got there. I'm not sure if it was not knowing anyone or drinking. He said it was the drinking at 3 in the afternoon. Too much for him. That makes me think, is it really wrong to drink that early? If you continue to live and are productive in society, who cares??

My body, my health

Jillian, I want her body, the fact that she honestly was overweight and lost it and is older remains my inspiration.

I just thought about this, I have not really talked about or really but much effort into the taking care of myself in a while. One thing I know is I cannot break totally free from the 160's. As of right now I am 167 pounds. I think my dream goal is about 145 pounds. How hard is that really??? I dont want to look at the bright side of once being heavier and not gained all that back. I want this last 20 pounds gone. I know it's my intake and I dont put enough emphysis on working out. I plan for every Sunday and fail before the day is done. If I could just get started and get in 1 good week, I would be on my way. I cancelled all my gym memberships as I never was going and it was wasted cash at the tone of 80.00 a month, ouch. In the deep back of my mind I hope with my new condo I will go. There is going to be a free full service gym there. We shall see. I can plan and all, but doing it.....another blog all to itself.

Home

I have finally decided to move out. I have tried to maintain, but realistically this is not worth it. it is too much house and too much MONEY. To even half way have this set up like I would like, would cost me so much money. I want something up to date, I want the comforts I should be able to afford. I want counter space to prep and cook on. I really wonder how women of long ago were able to cook in these tiny little kitchens.

New guy, same hair

Funny thing, some good friend coworkers of mine and I have known each other for a while and we have a mutual friend. This mutual friend is the best friend of one of my coworkers husband. That sounds like some baby-mama stuff. Anywho, nice guy, asked him to ask her for my number; Why didn't you just ask me??? After seeing him a few times, I now understand. Shy and reserved. Quite a gentleman I must say. I just might change my single for life plan.
My hair, same ole unchanged and hating it tree braids. I really need to decide to do something soon. Lace, braids something. Financially I am somewhat out of the woods, I have room to at least breathe now.

Hair thoughts

Still thinking a lace wig is it for me. I can get the straightness I want and totally protect my hair underneath. I think I want a straight and curly one for sure. Not sure, but I think I will start with a curly wavy like one. I think straight would be alot of work and possible issues with the install. I can for sure hide things in the wavey look and it will look like my own right now. We shall see.

On other relationships

Well these past few months even as financial issues have consumed me, I have made it a point to get out more anyway, I have met some good and some bad. Still waiting. My recent encounter of the pat month ot so is a financial wreck himself, I'm gonna break free of this one, I have enough problems on my own, dont need any help. Nice guy, but way too many problems. Too many kids and just a mess. I don't want problems in my life. Period. No drama, keep it all yourself.

Crisis averted

Ok, well the issues are over, more or less. At least it's just calmed enough to survive. I calculated that by the end of October it well get together and be somewhat back to normal.
Well, a funny thing happened the other day, I was at a friends birthday party, came after work, dressed in scrubs, but had a nice time. Well.....days later a good friend, that was there says a guy friend that was there wants my number??? Huh? Why didn't he just ask? Crazy part is, he has been at most of the events that we all attend. Most of my friends and coworkers are younger than me, so I assumed he was also. It took some doing to get the numbers passed and actually call. I called last night, but he was watching the debate, I didn't call back. Another time for this, I suppose.

Priate school secretary and more life anguish

OK, so my son is in a lovely private high school, oh wait I mean lovely expensive high school. I have been having an issue or to with this year amounts, scholarship info...etc. Well, everytime I called I always get the secretary, who's voice sounds like she has smoked since she was in pre-K, very nasty woman. Anyway, I've been told there is no scholarship aid for the year and I gotta pay the thousands upfront...HELLO??!!?? OK, well that's not gonna happen. *flashback a couple days....I am in a financial crisis, this doesn't help. So, back to the carcinogen breathing meanie at the school, my son is a good kid, a couple teachers and coaches went to bat for me. But get this, the smoked out frizzy hair heffa has reported that I had bounced checks last year! Um, to the tune of 7 she says. OK, I guess she assumed I was some ignorant black chic with a son that plays football well and was looking for a handout. Wrong, I am an educated black chica that happens to have a smart athlete for a son. Get it right. I called so quick to schedule a meeting with the principal ASAP. But what really pisses me off, I wrote the 2 checks for registration and 7 for the year. So, this would mean, every check bounced. So, if this were the case, why would it go this long (another school year) and no one say anything?? Not, his schedule and everything else came as it should, he has continued with everything as he should, and this wench says this? She so doesn't know me, I made my appt for Tuesday 8AM. I was at work and didn't leave until 3:30 today and work Monday. When I got home today, first thing I did??? went to my files, pulled out my carbon copies of my checks written, wrote done which check numbers where which and when, then checked online with my bank and wrote down when they were cleared, THEN went back to my files and pulled each months bank statements with the checks clearly displayed as paid....nothing ever returned, and will be taking it in on Tuesday. I hope she is there to explain the "bounced" check statement, in front of the principal. If not, I will be going by her office to accept her humble apologize for saying such a damaging thing about me. I am just so frustrated with the stupidity and nerve of people some times. I would be afraid to make such a comment, its one thing if a check, any check had ever bounced or there was a problem, this is not the case. I mean really, didn't she realize that I would either have access to cancelled checks from my bank, or copies or a record of payments or something???
One thing this does is make me think about myself and image I give off. However, this walking emphysema carrying nicotine addict has never SEEN me, only talked to me on the phone, and trust me, I am the whitest sounding black chic. I am a California native and pronounce every syllable as it should be.
Onto other thoughts, my hair is still braided in these tree braids. I like them enough but they shed a horrendous amount. I don't know if it is me or the way she did the hair. I have not talked to anyone else except the 1 or 2 people that were in the shop getting theirs done that day. I don't know if its this hair or what. I'm really wanting a lace front wig. I hate that I can't get to my hair, like I like to. It itches and I can't get in there well, I cant put all of my good stuff in there I like want to. So, its either take these out and get some more of my beloved cornrows or soak up massive amounts of info about lace fronts and just get one.
The men issue, I am at a loss. I am obviously doing something wrong. I don't understand why I have never been able to meet a SINGLE male. Yes I do have certain expectations, who doesn't? But I'm not so closed minded as to be completely inflexible. I seem to keep running into married, taken, boyfriend, etc men. What drives me nuts, some lie about it, but most of these bastards are upfront about their relationships and expect me to be OK with it. The nerve.

Lace Front Wig

I think this is my plan. I think this will save my hair underneath it, until it grows to a comfortable, well comfortable for me length. I don't want to damage what I have. I have gotten all the perm out and am letting my hair do its thing. More to follow.

Struggles

Well, it has finally all hit the fan. Every financial catastrophic event has come to a head. I need this month and Sept 5 to please get over with already.

Mobile blog

Ok trying something new, I always have my phone with me and text all the time. Why not have a mobile blog entry option.

More drama for me

Oh boy, where do I begin???
Men. Well I ran into a gentleman I dated long ago, I forgot why I didn't continue dating him and accepted a date. Now I remember. I tell ya, its not that I am some sort of gold digging premadonna, but I work hard and make a fairly decent amount of money and really would not want to deal with anyone elses drama. I have enough thank you. Well the dude, he has some kind of problem. I feel like something secretive is going on with him, I actually feel like he is looking for someone to help him with some horrific financial crisis. I don't know or maybe its me.

My Birthday came and was fabulous

Well I am now 39. Wow, almost 40. I feel like I could do anything, I feel like my time in the world has just begun. I can do anything. Have you ever felt that way??? I mean, there is no one to tell me no, no one to ty to change my mind or talk me out of it. I am my own person, and can do what I want. I am powerful.
Oh yeah, I finally cut all the perm from my hair. I want to grow it out and somehow I think I will probably at somepoint get some type of a texurizer. I dont know whats going to happen. I like straight hair, but like the strength of natural hair. I also believe it's stronger only because the care I would be giving it, natural or straigthened.

My secret crush

I have finally met someone, after 15 years of off and on dating and no real relationships. So far, I dont feel crowded....this is a major issue with me. He has a career, something he wanted to do and did it. (I love a determined spirit). We have many things in common, I am such a free will spirit, a complete sports nut. I hate it when a man instantly thinks a woman knows nothing about sports.

What has been goin on with my hair

Well it's still natural, yay me, this is some of the longest I have ever been on something ever. At this point I am serious about it. They say 30 days, well it's been since January 8th, 2008. I am still struggling with cutting it all off versus waiting a little longer to cut it all off. By all I mean the permed ends. I was so wrapped up into wondering what kind of hair type I had that I didn't realize I can't tell. So to any of you reading this, please let your hair get at least two or more inches of natural growth to understand your hair type. You just cant tell. Now if you've cut the perm off, you may see it sooner. I am not ready. My permed ends are not scraggly or bad, just straight. The hair is strong and healthy. I keep telling myself I need to keep the ends to allow for my braider to have something to grasp, so it will continue to look neat, but I think it really is just fear. I don't like short hair. It's not that it's ugly, I just don't like it. Another I have also noticed since wearing so many braided hairstyles, My appearance is more youthful with hair away from my face. I can not wear styles that cover my face. People have often given me compliments when I wore an up do, I always thought it was because my hair was "just done". No it's that fact that it was away from my face. I remember my mom telling me I had a perfect oval face, I took it to believe my face was long. No, it's oval and should be shown. I also believe my B vitamins and Omega 3-6-9 have totally helped with my appearance. I don't see eye lines or crevices. I will continue to watch this. So for now, I will keep braiding my hair, until I am ready to showcase it, when I am ready, I will upload before pics as well.

I am finally moving forward at work

Well I've been here, dealing with daily crap as it happens on a daily basis. I have finally been able to move forward at my job. I will be training into the next higher level role within the next month. I felt stuck to honestly say it. I have been around the medical field 18 years and my experience totally shows. I felt stifled. I felt like a few people were actually trying to hold me back, actually I know this was the problem. I like peer review, I think it makes for a better person, but when your not the best of friends with that person, the one that is to assist you in getting further, well.... you can imagine just how far you well be going.
Anyway more on this later.

Damn

The past always catches up with you. Not much more to say to this. I cant say I neccesarily believe in Karma, but it seems that when people knowingly do things wrong to others, that something then come back to you. It doesn't happen right away all the time, but when it does. Ouch! The crazy part about it, you don't realize it is all connected. I am feeling this right now. My tags are costing me such a mega issue in my life, I am beyond upset about it.

North Carolina

I am not a fan of Jacksonville. It is small, country and extremily slow. It woud be a nice place to visit as a couple feeling stressed out and wanted to get away from EVERYTHING. I had a horrible time, saw and did nothing and was never so ready to leave anywhere in my life.

Supplement update

I like to think I am sticking to updating about supplements every 30 days. For me 30 days is enough time to decide if it is beneficial or not. My diet is pretty good, far from the best, I eat way to much fast food and more sugar than I should. I exercise and have lost alot of weight and kept it off for at least 2 years. All that to say my nutritional status is not too lacking in general. So What am I doing now? Biotin , B50 caps {they go down easier than 1 biggo B100} MSM , Zinc, pantothenic acid, Niacinamide, Liquid multi, chlorophyll, EFA liquid that I mix in protien powder {totally disguises the taste}. Seems like alot, but my skin has never looked better if not younger. I even see the difference. My hair is still braided from lat month so i have no check on that yet, but I know it has grown from the pieces that have come down when I wash and condition my hair. I as gonna do it this week, but came to NC instead.

North Carolina

Damn it, I forgot my camera. I came to visit a friend for the weekend, since my previous plans to go out of town were squashed with the air conditioner unit craping out on me, funny it did it when it was about to be 100 some odd degrees. I didn't even have the AC on yet for the season. Why do things like that always seam to happen at the worst hour? All these months. On top of that, I find out the damn thing wasnt really working as it should all along. It had been running like for ever, pissed off all over again thinking about how much money I have proably spent with that damn thing running and running like that.
Let me go back to the title thought. North Carolina. I came to visit a friend, never been here and I'll be damn if I didn't leave my camera at home. Oh well, I think the best description is that old sitcom that used to come on in the 90's. something about "Wings" or something like that. The whole show was based on 2 brothers that owned a small airline cmpany, an older sarcastic women worked the ticket counter, some young chic with big hair was on etc>>>> you get the pic, anywho, that show was probably filmed here. I'd swear it was. To top it all off, my friend is now an hour late, and the police officer has already asked if I need to get help or am I at the wrong airport???? I thought about that for a second, there is a Jacksonville in Florida!! Oh Shitzola, I looked out the window to make sure I saw NC plates on the cars, yeah the airport is small enough I can look out any of the windows and see the entire parking lot.

men, singlehood, me

I am beginning to see a pattern, men in this late 30 age range are just sex crazy. They're married and alot of them are liars. I am a single woman, goodlooking, professional and great personality. (OK so I am not modest) any who, I think I would be a pretty lucky catch for any man, but unfortunately now most are married or taken in some way. It seems that the ones that are not are afraid. Very afraid, its kinda funny in fact. The last guy I dated was so insistent that I was not ready, when it was really him. I found out later on when he flipped out. wouldn't phone calls, just nonsense. When I asked did I upset him he said no, but is unsure about a relationship. OK well, I move on. I saw him just a couple weeks later and I guess he expected a better reception from me, as if that's not weird enough, he tells me that I didn't listen to him before, he harps on the word, YET, I'm like dude, you said you didn't want a relationship, I do, ((Hello)) make sense of that. You really expect me to sit and wait????

Golf

I decided I wanted to learn a new sport. I was tired of doing what I normally do and wanted to learn to play golf. So I set out. It actually is a fun sport. A coworker is giving me a set of clubs (FREE) I am so siked, I dont want to rush her, but I am about to go on vacation and the weather is good right now....YEAH!! Next step LPGA. LOL More on this later

Wii fit

I found one, I found one. I got one and I love it. It's my own trainer right here at home. A little slow on some things but obviously my atheltesim that I already have is whats causing that. I love it though, lots a fun.

my puff inspiration

I took a photo of my friends puff and it rocks.

Carols Daughters products

Well I went into Sephora and finally saw the carols daughter products. *SIGH* I really hoped it would work for my hair....NOPE!! well at least not right now. I tried the leave-in conditioner spray a couple times and to no avail. It felt kinda dry. I have braids so maybe that's the problem. I've read and seen where my braids soak up all my moisture. We'll see when I am ready to take these out for good. I think my hair is at a decent length but I am just not ready. I can't personally get past the short hair idea. Even though my cut was a short cut. (go figure). Anywho.......while I was in the "ETHNIC" section of Sephora, up walks a natural young chick, and I swear I have seen her fotki, she looked so familiar to me. I wasn't sure how to strike up the convo. Well, she got some of the smoothie stuff, good smelling, but pricey and she seemed very happy to have gotten the last one, "it's the only good thing really" I should've listened. The salesgirl, kept raving how good the products were for "our hair" ( funny thing she looked familiar also, she had her hair in twists, not completely sure if she had recently BC'd or was transitioning). I wanted to go back a day ago and tell her to please not emphasize how well a product is, make sure you alert people of others comments also. Our hair comes in many different shapes and types.

NUSmile Teeth whitening

Ok, I am a true PJ (product junkie if you are unaware). I went into the mall and sa this the other day. Wish I had taken better pics of before. I saw the change like right away. I was shocked. They rated me a 3.5 and after 1....that's a change of 6 shades. WOW! I have thought of trying this in the dental office many times, but just couldn't see myself paying 800 bucks for it. I watched the movie and thought long and hard an did it. I keep looking at my teeth.

Supplements update

Well my PJism got me again, I want something for growth, Biotin officially makes me breakout, DAMN, it works super good. I wouldn't so much mind the breakouts but they are large painful big red bumps that turn to bigger black marks. I think my final OK dose is about 500 mcg daily in a capsule form from Wegmans grocery. I don't know if it is more pure or what. I also still take the Silica, it does great with my nails and I think it makes my hair accept moisture better. If that makes any sense. I wonder though, is it making my hair come in straight like this? Alot of the Fotki-ers spots I have looked at, have gone through trial and error. I started with their abundance of info and no hair, so I am taking a second to say THANKS to all, Thanks. So, according to most on the Alta page at LHCF.com it takes me going through this first bottle to notice anything. I started right off with 2 tabs as I have been taking other things and had once before taking Silica, it was liquid though. It seemed to work well, but I also had been eating poorly and not drinking water, stopped exercising, the whole nine yards, just a mess of a blob trying to get out of my rut. I wander f that initial boost was strictly cuz I was so out of the healthy loop? Well I will attempt to come back to this very same issue in about a month or two and see what's what.. In the meantime I will wathc and see. I can say that I have gotten into the pill taken, liquid multi drinking regime well. I take my supplements on at least 90% days more than not, so for me, hey, that's outstanding. 3 months of doing the right thing for me. YEAH me.

Cutting*******Flashback (((harps sounding)))

Well, I took my braids out and CUT more of the perm out, I only have about 1.5 inches of it left. I don't know why I wont just cut it out. About 5 years ago I cut it all out, but I remember being so upset with the perm and color and my hair falling out.************ Flash back 2003, I wanted a lighter color, in the middle of dry a$$ wnter no less. (what was I thinking)******************Dumb mistake number one, then I went to a NEW stylist, Dumb mistake number two, I felt uneasy and ignored it, Dumb anf final mistake number three. My hair was immediatly in shock and revolted at my first shampoo. I do remember him saying "You need more moisture" but he didn't explain how. I hate when people try to make me buy things and can't tell me anything about whats in it or how to use it or why I NEED to buy it. Well as the days and weeks go on, I notice my hair thinning horribly, I pushed it off as a bad overpermed hair. I tried more moisture as I only knew how, added water every day, but knew nothing of anything. No oil sealant no shea, no coconut oil, nothing. Then as my hair kept thinning, I went back to the same hair dresser....he was fired, what a surprise. Now I was hurt, because I knew better and was silly enough to let it happen. I tried every cream and grease in the BSS, of course all a waste of money and time. My hair was like straw that had been burnt by the sun and watered down and then left outside to dry out. On top of this it was winter still.....arghh, I decided as soon as it warmed up a little and I finished my semester I was going to cut and braid my hair. And that's exactally what I did. I got the funds together and went into my bathroom and cut it all off, anything that felt hard, I cut. I remember feeling good and light, it was shrunked and tight, if only I knew then what I know now.*************speed up 2005, I finally took the braids out. Boy had my hair grown, I really don't remember doing anything special to it, just left it braided. I don't think I had it out of braids for longer than half a day during these two years. I remember when I did get a perm the stylist was asking over and over about doing a operm. I was like, "Hell yeah, what is your problem, why would I walk around with this curled up mess" She was so reluctant. I didn't listen. But, the perm turned out gret, my hair had grown it's longest. I was shoulder length and growing. My hair just kept on growing, all I did was perm, trim every 6-8 weeks and wrap. no heat at home, deep condition every 2 weeks and it kept growing. THEN, my stylist got too busy and suddenly too expensive. My hair didn't break, but it stopped growing. again I was on the market for a new stylist, again with over processing and then came the breakage. ::::::::fast forward late 2006 I cut it into the chic style, didn't have to worry if it broke, heck I cut it so much, it became a staple thing for me to do. I also found hair loc's exstentions. My new cut and style was great. my hair was feeling good again, however this time I was using my chi flat iron daily and washing weekly......hmmm, no breakage?!? so of course what happened the beging of 2008, my stylist announces that she is leaving the area, moved 4 hours away. I contemplated continuing and driving to have my exstentions done, I didn't want to lose another styliest that my hair liked. THEN while I was online searching for directions to her shop I found a website, girly webzine. I was in awe of the hair and care, but thought "yeah right she's mixed anyway, my hair wont be like that" Then I followed a link on her site to LHCF.com. Oh the motherload. I saw thousands of women, with their natural hair, half permed hair, everything. I was so excited. I never went back to look for directions. I was up for weeks searching, stalking, learning. I was in heaven. I immediatly changed my hair routine, my hair was so excited, it felt suddenly so different, like overnight. I bought oils and creams and read labels. I felt like I had started a new diet. I was so overly cautious with everything for my hair. ;;;;;;;Today;;;;;; well that' the story, but still after all that, I couldn't cut this last few inches. I think mostly because my hair is healthy, even the permed ends, they are in fabulous shape. It seems wrong to cut good hair, but it is straight hair. I am getting it braided today, it has been out only for the night and that's too much, I have touched my hair more in these 12 hours than I probably ever have in my life. My hair is super thick, I can kinda see the texture, but the permed ends are a bit harder to really see. I decided at the start to transition then cut, but I remember how my hair grew, fast and that was without my vitamins and care, it could only thrive now. But, I am a anal chic and my plan was to slowly with each set of braids cut more perm out. Although, I cut way more than planned it really grew faster than planned. So now here I am getting ready to go get it braided and really wanting to cut it all off. But then I want to twist the front and individual the back. I don't like individuals in the front as I have realized this is way too much stress on my hairline. pulling into a ponytail, washing and turning ans just too much business. I can handle the back, but my hair grows so fast now, that it would dread up.Sooo, that's my story. I am going natural and staying with it. I am at point where I want length badly, but will not sacrifice for it.

Still Braided

I have never really like these cornrows, but they are serving a purpose. I have no desire to perm or anything like that, but I hate these cornrows. I would've done the twists or something, but I was afraid of the manipulation so early on. I just want to get my hair back in order and I will go from there. So I guess cornrows it is until I change something. I think I have gotten the vitamin and all to a numerical science. On the site I noticed alot of people complaining about Biotin. It works fabulous, but I don't think many folks really understand how to take things. It's like the process of doing our hair. We learned how to moisturize an seal, we learned to decrease manipulation and condition it well. Yet ladies have not gotten a good understanding of the process of taking supplements and give up without proper usage. OK, maybe it's my nursing background that gets me a little upset about it all, but I wish folks would study up on it before giving up, just like they did to get the hair together.

Vitamns and Minerals

On to another thought, I have decided to try to incorporate organic type products or products that I have made and know what is in it. I have a few fav things that or commercially prepared that my hair likes that I will keep .Cantu Shea No-Break; my hair and nails LOVE this stuff. I bought it first after finding both these boards and my hair immediatly liked this stuff was glue!!! It stopped breaking. It was the wildest thing ever. I mean really I would have tons of hair on my shoulders from simple combing my hair with a huge comb, I had to wear a towel to keep my clothes clean. I just had a bright idea???!!! make a product review. I have alot of PJism and may as well start now with passing my 2cents along.Another thing I have noticed is my hair is super dry, I had never known this. All the years of perming and flat ironing I never really noticed this. The flat iron always glides through with my hair with my redkin smooth down heat protectant and it always felt smooth all day. Back in March I used ORS and Biologe leave in and my own oil mixture, my hair drastically changed it felt like baby hair all day, but then i noticed it was greasy like. I think I needed to clarify with some ACV and keep going, because, when I stopped using the ORS olive oil and decreased my oils this dryness came. But, my hair is also braided now, so I dont know maybe the fake hair is sucking up my moisture, but I am going to have to find something to give me some moisture so I dont lose anything with my braids. We shall see.I found some Omegas I can finnally tolerate. also some B's. I switched my multi to a liquid and everything has been gravy since. I have it down to a science. check the pics for visual details.

Done

Well I finally got all that weave out of my hair and got my hair braided, already put the pics up. It was one of the easiest decisions I have had to make. Once I got them out I was clipping and clipping. I didn't exactly do a BC as I don't really have that much hair anyway I suppose its about an inch or so. anywho, I really needed to get them out and start anew. I have all the products one could possibly need and had actually started using them, but as many have said; short hair is so hard. I want to just wear it and be done. Unfortunately the stares an comments would get the best of me. why is this? Why is it acceptable to wear LONGER hair and not short? It would be most acceptable to the public eye to have a biggo puff or fro, but not a TWA? The biggo puff started somewhere right? All the media shots of fros, puffs and etc. are LONGER....everything on all these helpful sites show hair LONGER. Even on this journey I have embarked upon for LONGER hair I have chosen to braid it out of site until it is at a "socially" acceptable length whereas I don't need heat or other such manipulations. It's not right, but it is true.

Vitamins and hair

Glad I'm not at work...I really dislike silly jokes. I luv to laugh, but geez make it good.Oh, yeah to what I was doing at hand here. I have been doing pretty good with my vits etc. I'm actually proud of myself. But then again I have a prescribed med that I take daily and have for a couple years. Makes taking more pills quite easy. I also got one of those pill holder thingies for 7 days a week and can transport it with me. it's pretty cool.What am I taking?MSM from GNC 1000mg daily Biotin 500mcg daily (going to up this to twice daily)Viactiv flavorglides mvi dailyB12 injection from my doc every 2-3 weeks So far at these amounts my hair,skin and nails have thrived. I last had a perm 1/5/2008. It used to be that my hair would shed like a hairy beast in a humid jungle. Now...OMG almost none. I mean it! NONE. My stylist think I went elsewhere, but nope. I told her I would come for a perm eventually, but not yet. I don't really need to. I'm not sure how long I will stretch this, but so far...I've got even little springie curls, like the metal thing inside of a pen all around NG. I've even been tempted to cut this all out to itty, bitty super teeny weeny afro, but not yet. I've done it before, then braided it for a year straight (back then it was because I had no money for the salon).So for a months report....vitamins, cowash, ORS moisture lotion, Biolage leave in, MN and natural oils tea tree,grapeseed,jojoba and EVOO work for this chic. Gotta get this weave out to post some true photos.

Begin somewhere

I have post in different spots everywhere, paper, sites, everything. I am going to try and compile it all and put here. Wish me luck. I have things that go back 3 plus years.